EVERYTHING I NEED, AND THEN SOME - at the click of my mouse

One of the things I love about Google's gmail is that the spam blocker is excellent. Every couple of days I go in to give my spam folder a peek, just to make sure that nothing important has been dumped there. The subject lines on some of the spam emails make me laugh out loud - here are some of the best ones - and my immediate thoughts upon reading them:

Be Your Own Boss - This just screams failure. I'm too soft and would let myself loaf and have fun when I should be working. I would be a lousy boss, even over myself.
Diaper Promotion Click Here - I don't think so. Two words - Too Old.
You Have Been Selected to Live a Life of Luxury - I wouldn't recognize a life of luxury if it bit me on the ass.
A Forensics Degree is the Key to Unlocking your Potential - I guess they don't know that I can't brush my teeth without gagging, there's no way I could be in forensics. My potential will just have to remain locked up.
OVERWEIGHT? Lose between 2 and 14 inches in ONE hour! - I figure this must involve varying degrees of amputation - starting with a pinky and working up to a forearm.
Looking for a Hot Date? - Um, see the diaper promotion response above.
Your friends will be amazed with all your chixs! If I had "chixs", my friends would be amazed, all right. So would my husband.
hump - What? That's it? Just hump? Who, what, where, when??
Get a flat belly by Friday! Do they not realize what day it is? They must be dealing in miracles.
Say farewell to ED! - Ok I give up, who is Ed and where is he going?
One click repair for your computer - It seems to me that if my computer needs repair, clicking isn't going to do much good.
What silly subjects show up in your spam folder?
Have a great weekend, everyone! We're under yet another winter storm watch for this weekend. I'm so very ready for spring. Our crocus have been peeking out of the snow for a couple of weeks now, poor little things, trying to find the sun.
Hugs,
Laurie